AKA Raquel freaks out about something that’s probably not even that big of a deal.
I’ve been wanting to tap into writing as a potential career since always. About a year ago, inspired by the new year new me slogan that takes over many people’s Januaries, I set out to get as many posts published, and to write content once a week. That momentum pushed me forward for a total of two weeks (lol), but I did manage to get one or two articles published on the website, The Financial Diet. And then, three months later, I posted an article on a random Canadian site after I had gotten really into Yoga for like ten minutes. All those were great, and were in reality, very motivating. However, I was (and still am) working for a startup, and the demands of those hours quickly caught up to me. So I stopped.
A year and some change later, the writing virus has invaded my psyche once again. Sign up for Upwork, it yelled. Create your own fashion blog. You are the next Influencer, it said.
And then, I came across Song of Style for the first time (which I realize in fashion blog land, is like, not even news), and quickly grew obsessed with her style and overall branding. So, that got my mind racing even more.
So, then, I re-activated my Upwork account. I added my three measly listicles that I didn’t even get paid for to my portfolio. I searched the newest fashion writing ads, and applied to a few. And then I got my first client! As I started my research for a 2000 word article, I was taken back to my anxiety-ridden grad school days, began drowning in questions about journalistic integrity, overthought every given sentence–questioned whether this was even really worth it–Tools > Word Count > ugh really??–and the perfectionist voice quickly started to out-yell the one that had encouraged me to write in the first place.
I was more worked up in that moment than I had been for a while at my actual, full-time job. If this client isn’t happy, I will NEVER GET ANOTHER CLIENT. And of course they won’t be happy, THIS ARTICLE IS GARBAGE YOU ARE NOT A WRITER WHAT ARE YOU DOING.
So I decided to channel my angst and go to the gym. And then I proceeded to run 4 miles. Which I have only ever done once in my life. You win some, you lose some, I suppose?
I subsequently came home, was hopped up on adrenaline, and then just decided to write the damn post and it was magical and even MORE than 2000 words and was a content marketing miracle!!!!!!
Lol. False. That, in fact, did not happen. Instead, I created this blog. I’ll tackle my real work tomorrow.